@LukeErd: You love him. Your parents approve him. He buys you flowers and chocolate. He wrote you a poem that rhymes "wood" with "food."
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@JohnLyonTweets: I'm scared to open any email with a photo attachment because of all this talk about photobombing.
@EliHansenMusic: I'm at my most immature when girls misspell "cologne" and start talking about how bad a man's colon smells
@WigCannon: What if the missing plane is still up there? "What?" Did you check the sky? "No." See, this is why you'll never advance, Kevin.