@Jebo_te_patak: You say tomato, I say that's a weird thing to say for no reason. We were just sitting here quietly, and you're all "tomato." You can leave.
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@SatansTongue: *Ohio State coach* Boys, I know how we're gonna beat the Oregon Ducks "How coach" With our secret weapon *pulls out a loaf of bread*
@ramblinma: My life is a constant battle between wanting to correct grammar and wanting to have friends.
@jdbalani: The self checkout lane was probably invented by a guy who was sent to the store to buy tampons.
@Playing4Second: I'm probably at my sexiest when I'm moving my head around trying to see if it's a smudge on my sunglasses or an eye floaty