@Jebo_te_patak: You say tomato, I say that's a weird thing to say for no reason. We were just sitting here quietly, and you're all "tomato." You can leave.
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@EndhooS: [Don't let hot barrista know I'm a goose] "Can I get you a coffee?" Just a honk chonklate for me "A what?" CHOCOLATE, a hot chocolate plz.
@funnybeachgirl: With the holidays upon us, please dont forget what they stand for. Family, friends & punching strangers at the mall because they cut in line
@blimeyguvnor: I got the lyrics wrong and partied like it's 1599. Now my kitchen smells like roast peacock and I can't get this horse off my couch
@imskytrash: cop: could you please describe the man who tried to kill you me: yeah he was not nice