@Love_bug1016: “You should eat only six fries per serving.” What’s next? Telling us something psycho like eating an entire pizza doesn’t count as one serving?
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@Prof_Peejay: Me: "You flunked the labs & the midterm. You need 154% in the final to pass." Him: "So there's still a chance?" Me: "Let me ask my unicorn."
@vineyille: Sir this bag is too heavy, you’ll have to pay an extra $25 to check it. Sure thing *dumps 2500 pennies from bag onto counter*
@AngelicGirlxD: I’m 22 years old & I just realized that “This little piggy went to the market” doesn’t mean he went food shopping
@AndyAsAdjective: Once dated a girl name Lolly just so I could introduce her to my dad & say "This is Lolly, Pop." Broke up with her like 5 minutes later.