@super_morgasm: You shouldn't be allowed to wear animal print if you are bigger than said animal.
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@mackswift: Ladies, not every guy who talks to you wants to bang you. Some of us know that you have snacks in your purse.
@simoncholland: I was going to sign this permission slip to let my daughter watch The Grinch at school but I haven't heard back from North Korea yet.
@weinerdog4life: No, your baby was definitely crying before I dropped it, that's why I dropped it.