@infamousone96: You tell me to "walk a mile in your shoes" but the second I break into your house to steal your shoes, you call the cops. Make up your mind.
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@_davidlucas_: *At the ouija board* Me: Err... mom? Can't we just... Ouija board: A-N-D A-N-O-T-H-E-R T-H-I-N-G
@LindaInDisguise: Listening to a global economy futurist. Pretty sure in 20 years Chinese parents will say "Clean your plate, people in the US are starving."
@Darlainky: [at lunch with friend] Friend: ... but you didn't hear that from me. Me: [looking up from my phone] Hear what? Friend: Exactly *winks*