@simoncholland: You wouldn't believe all of the Easter eggs I just found lying in the grass outside of this pre-school.
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@brentcetera: SO AFTER I CAUGHT HER CHEATING ON ME I WANTED TO JUMP OUT OF A PLANE AND DIE. ANYWAY MY NAME’S TOM AND I’LL BE YOUR TANDEM PARACHUTE PARTNER
@LoveNLunchmeat: Canadian Psycho, but it's just a businessman walking around with a chainsaw, apologizing profusely
@causticbob: Greek people must feel like a tampon. They live in one of the most beautiful places in the world, but at the worst period.