@simoncholland: You wouldn't believe all of the Easter eggs I just found lying in the grass outside of this preschool.
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@corinnemlwsw: "there's nothing sexier than a chick that knows how to work on cars" Dudes, trying to get us to do that job too.
@hamspamtymaam: Instead of chasing after Taylor Swift, I'm just going to wait until she breaks up with everyone else so I'm all that's left.
@david8hughes: Doctor: ok, just need a urine sample & we're done. Me handing him my boxers: I'm in a rush. Just wring these out.