@SilentIstheJ: You're like the menstrual cramp and bloating of people.
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@badbanana: If you tell me you're a fan of One Direction, please clarify if you're referring to the boy band or Kim/Kanye's baby.
@causticbob: I walked a girl home last night, and things got a little awkward at one point. She turned around and found out I was walking her home.
@TheMichaelRock: I think we should line up all the presidential candidates and see which one a dog doesn't bark at. That person should become president.
@msmegmensa: A little drunk. Playing scrabble with my cat. Not sure who's winning cause he's eaten most of his tiles.