@GreenishDuck: You're on your deathbed. You gather the strength to utter your last words "Boxers with pockets," you say. "You'll never have to wear pants."
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@MomOnFire: Granny, pay attention and don't panic. I need you to think hard and tell me how many brownies you ate out of the blue pan.
@bobbiejo448: Every time I use <3 in an @ to someone, I can't help but think, "Please accept this carrot with balls as a token of how much I heart you."
@WilliamAder: Someone tweeted today that they were "29-ish" and I didn't know you could "ish" 15 years.