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@Grind_n_Roll: You're the she to my nanigans.
@adult_mom: I hate when people ask if my newborn is a "good baby" and I have to tell them that he cries a lot and about how he keeps robbing banks
@ChaseMit: The iPad Air is named after what's left in your bank account when you buy one.
@WheelTod: *Prosecution points to badger*: Objection! This animal has no place in court!
Defense: Your honor, the badger is prosecuting the witness
@leftarmisme: Much like Apple products, I also, am only compatible with myself.
@TomMughal: I just got mistaken for an employee at a haunted house. Assume it's because I look authoritative not because I look like I'm wearing a mask.