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@TomSchally: Ever notice how loud the sound of opening a beer can at work is?
@bouncingblonde: Just made jerk off motions at a group of construction guys. They just stood there staring at each other like "now what?"...all talk eh boys?
@WilliamAder: So, we tip the pizza delivery guy, but not ambulance drivers.
@Cpin42: God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, courage to change the things I can, and a dog that does karate
@titanmoon10: I hate when you have 47 items and the cashier asks, “Do you need a bag?” Oh no, I’m heading right back to the circus, so I’ll just juggle all this shit for 6 miles”