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@VampireIguana: Adam: Eve, you read the terms and conditions before using that Apple product right? Eve: Uh yeah, totally
@TheWidowmakerX: 'I choose my underwear based on how likely I am to have sex. Today, I'm wearing a used grocery bag I found floating across the highway'
@tracietom: 8 yr old: Mom, what do you want to be? Me: Single, living in Bahamas, no kids, maybe operate a little dive shop, driv-- 8: I mean for Halloween Me: Oh, I don't know I haven't really thought about it