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@TheRolo: "Your lifeguard résumé is just a pic of David Hasselhoff" I feel it says all u need to know about me "He's drunk with a cheeseburger" Yes
@luckyshirt: I don't eat animals because I object to how poorly they are treated and raised. Which is why I eat well-loved children.
@Brampersandon_: [ME]: *pointing up to the sky writer plane* it’s a message for you babe [GF]: oh how romantic [SKYWRITER]: KATE WILL YOU MA- [GF]: omg yes i wi- [ME]: wait keep watching [SKYWRITER]: -KE SURE TO BUY THE NAME BRAND COCOA PUFFS NEXT TIME LIKE I ASKED YOU IDIOT