If eHarmony were honest, it would pair some people with a room full of cats.
You Might Also Like
I accidentally sent my kids to Mimecraft camp and haven’t heard from them since.
When coming out of any coma, try keeping your eyes shut for another day or two to see what everyone’s saying about you.
Pony: “I love hay so much I-”
Dad: “Why don’t you marry it, ya big nerd?”
*pony grows up*
*becomes Horse Emperor*
*legalizes hay marriage*
We’ve all talked about throwing a dirty dish away instead of washing it. But only some of us have done it.
HIM: somebody should probably do the dishes
ME: *drinking wine out of a bowling trophy* agree to disagree
Computer: shutting down
Justin Bieber only pretends to retire on Twitter, worst Christmas ever.
People who say “in and of itself” are responsible for most of the trouble in the world.
Twitter announced today that they’ve lost 134 million dollars this year. I don’t know if they want us to look for it or what the deal is.