@agathagotstoned: A coffee table book, but it's just pictures of me being forcibly awakened by the employees of various mattress stores across the country.
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@doggiedogthedog: I asked my wife how to turn Alexa off. She said, I don’t know, have you tried walking through the room naked?
@Dmvm1977: When I get home to find my wife naked in the tub, seductively asking me to "warm her up", I dont waste a second.. to throw in a hairdryer
@LOVELADONNIS: Woman on the plane just asked her crying son "are you gonna be a gangsta or a crybaby" I'm like damn are these the only options?