@KalvinMacleod: Baby sharks can hunt for food as soon as they are born and my children cannot find their underwear drawer.
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@Tommytoughstuff: *Picks up extra virgin olive oil. *smirks* "Not for long my friend. Not for long."
@Jake_Vig: Two roads diverged in a wood, and I... I was looking down at my phone and walked directly into a tree, And that has made all the difference.
@adult_keverage: Bought a 2nd cell phone to leave on the coffee table as a decoy when I go tweet in the bathroom.