I just spent a ridiculous amount of time trying to spell Wednesday, so I canceled the event.
[Buzzfeed for Cats]
6 THINGS THAT WILL MAKE U BOLT FROM THE ROOM
-Nothing. Nothing at all
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Hangman is a weird game to let kids play. Hey kid, if you don’t think of this word, a random man will be put to death.
fireman: where is fire
me: in my heart, i love y-
fireman: [pulls out firehose] brace yourself this is gonna hurt
*approaches a girl, tips hat* M’lady.
*approaches a material girl, tips hat* M’donna.
I think we should hear adeles boyfriends songs before we pick sides.
The problem with speaking the truth is..
..you assume others do too
*leads wife into bedroom where rose petals on comforter spell out “NO, YOU TAKE OUT THE GARBAGE”
I don’t understand, he hasn’t been mauled by a lion yet.
“Put your pants on grandma, you’re scaring the reptiles!”
– Me, camping
Nobody’s a bigger drama queen than soup in a microwave.