@: By age 35 you should have like 2 real friends both of whom live in other states and around 700 online friends with whom your relationship is so tenuous that a simple opinion about a comic book movie could end it instantly.
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@Mirimade: Marriage 1st Year. Husband: Hey, beautiful, I’ve got candles lit and sexy music, ready for a night of romance? Me: *blushes* Marriage 6th Year: Husband: The kids are asleep, wanna have sex real quick? Me: I literally just poured the milk on my cereal.
@pleatedjeans: [spiders pour into room] THEYRE EVERYWHERE [group of tap dancers enter] ALRIGHT MEN THIS IS WHAT WEVE TRAINED FOR