@UncleBob56: Came downstairs to watch the game and the channel had changed. Looked at the dog, he looked back, then slowly slid his paw off the remote.
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@ShortSleeveSuit: GUY: how’s it going? ME [scraping the ‘us’ off my Prius]: well it’s not going great, Ron
@stephenjmolloy: Doctor: "How many fingers am I holding up?" Ian: "err... 13..." Doc: "Yeah. Some of these are yours. You've been in a serious accident."
@ArfMeasures: Doctor: You have 6 months to live Me: omg what can I do? Doctor: Oh lots of things Me: Phew Doctor: but only for 6 months
@ArfMeasures: ME: This car's perfect except for one thing WIFE: Yes, there's no room for the childre- ME: [finds cup holder] lol I was wrong, it's perfect