“Carrie” is my favourite movie about how religious faith leads to supernatural mass murder.

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[after sitting 21 hours for a portrait drawing]
painter: I’m done
me: ok now let’s do a silly one


If I ever go missing, just follow my kids. They can find me no matter where I try to hide!


I’m sick of this one horse town
*moves to two horse town*
No, no, this is too much


Dad:I don’t trust those trees…..
Son: Why? What do you mean?
Dad: They seem kind of shady


gf: come over
me: i’m coming over
gf: we should stop using walkie talkies in bed over


Who said chivalry is dead, I open the door at least a hundred times a day for my cat and dogs.


Establish dominance by shaking your spouse’s hand when they go in for a kiss.


Demi Lovato is my favorite singer that is half human, half Lovato.


I only look good from one angle and if someone could please tell me what that angle is I’d be grateful