Friend: did you know that only female mosquitos bite?
*later walking home*
Me, getting eaten alive: evening ladies
Me: I wish Jim was alive. He was my best friend
Priest: Jim is alive. I saw him yesterday
Me: Yeah I was getting to that part
You Might Also Like
My 10 yr old googled how many states are in Oregon so I guess geography skills are like genetic or whatever
First person to see an eclipse: SHIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII…oh okay
Parenting goals before having kids: make tons of blanket forts, never lose your temper, appreciate every minute.
After: sit down.
Remembering the evil paraglider today. Wondering how he’s faring in all this.
Couldn’t afford a butterfly knife, so I got a caterpillar one. Now, I wait.
Mitt Romney has decided not to run for president. In other news, I have decided not to become a billionaire or play in the NBA.
Dad come get me from practice
“Sorry I’m going into a tunnel” *sound of mom giggling*
But I called the *connection drops* …landline
POLICE! OPEN UP, WE KNOW YOU’RE IN THERE. WELL, WE DON’T KNOW BUT WE’RE KINDA HOPING YOU ARE COS IT WAS A LONG DRIVE & JIM NEEDS TO PEE.