we need a disney princess who is the shark from the movie Jaws
Damn it’s cold out. Better wear a coat, hat, gloves & boots. Sorry legs, you’re still getting pants only, thanks for doing all the work tho
You Might Also Like
Turns out that the best way to find a flat head screw driver is to pretend to look for a phillips one.
Hollywood sets impossible standards we can never live up to. Not even once have I saved people from dinosaurs with my knowledge of Unix.
Some say the glass is half empty. Some say it’s half full. I ask “Are you going to finish that?”.
Now that the Statue of Liberty is dark, there’s no way they’re letting her into the U.S.
Because one Duran just wasn’t enough.
I began writing full time 20 years ago. I’ve sold lots – my tv, my car, my jewellery…
Nothing in this life is certain, except death and taxes.
And stepping in water if you’re wearing socks.
Him: Can you please stop using the bananas like they are phones
Me: But how am I supposed to contact the gorillas
Him: You’re unbelievable!
Gorilla *over banana*: When are you leaving him?
why do they call it involuntary manslaughter and not a grave mistake