Did Ace of Base ever do another song wherein it was explained what happened to her original baby?
You Might Also Like
Did you know when someone annoys you it takes 42 muscles to frown but only 4 to extend your arm and punch them in the face.
Do you think the rattlesnake is ever embarrassed that he has a stupid baby toy at the end of his string body
ME: What would you like to name your new cat?
KID: Dog.
ME: But it’s a cat.
KID: That’s the cat’s problem.
wife and kids are threatening to remove me from the family group chat because my Android is messing it up and now I’m certain that I made the right phone choice
Me: I’ll take Complete The Phrase for $1000.
Alex Trebek: If you love someone, you should set them…
Me: What is “on fire”, Alex.
Doctors offices be like hi we’ll take you right in the room take your vitals and then leave you in there for 2 hours.
Him: It’s only a 20 minute hike. Why do you insist on so much bug spray?!
Me: Keeps the murder hornets away
Him: There’s no murder hornets in our state
Me: Then the spray is working
Boss ordered me a new office chair and I’m uneasy about this eject button.
[creation of kangaroo]
God: give that bouncy dog a fanny pack
Angel: *hands bouncy dog a fanny pack*
God: no no like build it into its stomach hahaha
Angel: again with this shit
Early morning sibling drama: 4 is upset with 6 because he told 4 everyone in the family featured in his fun dream except her because his dream “was limited to those aged 6+.”
i wonder why they stopped looking
The wife is out of town so you know what that means. That’s right, unsupervised eating.
Bought coffee flavoured ice cream hoping the kids would hate it and I could have it all but NOPE! Joke’s on me!
Curse you,
gloriously divine Häagen-Dazs in literally any flavour.
me:
I like to speak to my attorney please.wife:
Just tell me which shoes look better please.
His Holiness the Dalai Lama invited you to play Candy Crush.
Now I lay me down to rest.
I pray your TC loves you best.
If he does choose another,
I sincerely hope it’s not your mother.
*hip thrusts my way to the buffet table*
Me: I wish I could see your skeleton.
Him: I love how everything you say is sweet but also vaguely threatening.
ME: *Buying unnecessary & expensive gadget*
CASHIER: How will you be paying for this?
ME: Probably with an argument and no sex for a month
“What do you get if you cross a monkey and a lion?”
I glance nervously over to the basement door, afraid she’s seen something she shouldn’t.
Quarantine has given me some free time so I made an exit survey for people who left me on read on dating sites
[PetSmart]
Why pay $30 for a bird when I can pay $10 & grow like 1000 of them?
*throws bag of bird seed in cart*
I’m such a smart shopper.
Things changed for the better for Harry and Ginny’s marriage once they mastered the difficult “Turgidic Maximus” charm
Crypto is over. This is the year of cryptic currency. Pay for your groceries with a mumbled prophecy and a cursed stone.
You can basically pressure anyone to do something by publicly saying: On the count of three! One, two-
In my town it’s: Package delivered, here’s a picture of it at someone else’s house
“What’d you do this weekend?”
I was shooting craps.
“Oh you went to a casino?”
*flashback to blasting dog turds with shotgun* Um, yeah.
ready to be harvested
Welcome to your 40s, your favorite songs are on the radio again. They call it classic rock now, but still.
PEN SHOP OWNER: *Revealing huge sign with slogan he just created* “The pen is mightier than the sword”
SWORD SHOP OWNER NEXT DOOR: Jesus Christ, Phil, why would you—we’re not even in competing markets!