@KatieBurnett: Do people who happily announce their pregnancy know they are going to be stuck with a baby afterwards?
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@WilliamAder: Scientists are attempting to clone Ice Age Cave Lions because running into a raccoon when I take out the trash isn't scary enough.
@fro_vo: [spelling bee] Your word is "echo" can you use it in a sentence? SENTENCE entence enᵗᵉᶰᶜᵉ ᵉᶰᶜᵉ ᶜᵉ
@Merman_Melville: Apple watch, loudly: "It is time for you to poop" Me: "A-as I was saying, our investors h-" Watch, louder: "It is your optimal poop time"
@wife_housy: Being a mom means being the first one up in the morning, the last one to bed at night, and the only one drinking during church.