@PetrickSara: Does anyone know a good locksmith? I spent the entire day cleaning the entire house and need to keep my family out.
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@caithuls: DATE: I like someone with a good sense of humor ME: Ah ok I don't have that one but I got like touch and smell and so on
@tastefactory: Assistant: Uh sir? Your personalized jean jacket is very cool but it looks like the store screwed up. It says STAN on the back. Satan: WHAT
@ShortSleeveSuit: COP: you can’t hide from the long arm of the law ME [under the couch]: please stop tickling me
@FredTaming: her: the limit on tacos is 6 per person, sir me: can i get 7 her: no me: 8 her: no me: 9 her: no me: 10 her: you can’t do this forever me: are you even familiar with numbers her: yes? me: 11