All these Email scams must make it hard for Legitimate Nigerian Royalty to share large sums of cash with strangers!
First off I want to commend you for taking part in credit counselling. Now, under assets you wrote “like an onion”. Can you clarify?
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I’ll race you to the bedroom, winner gets to pick the hole.
if you ever feel useless, remember someone made a protective cover for Nokia 3310
Shutdown Apocalypse Update: Hearing now that the government closed the Grand Canyon. Not sure if they roll a tarp over it or how that works.
“Salsa. Ballet. Conga. Waltz. Jitterbug. Tap.”
“Thanks for attending my dance recital.”
nurse: “if youre going to give grapes to a baby make sure you cut them in half”
me: [visibly confused]
wife: “the grapes keith not the baby”
Offering the floral arrangement as a meal to the gluten free, lactose intolerant, allergy ridden vegetarian is apparently not ok.
GOOD COP: We can do the easy way…
BAD COP: Or the hard way.
UNDERCOVER COP: [muffled] Guys, get under the covers with me! It’s so cozy and I have a flashlight and comic books under here!
No you can’t throw a ham at the rotor blade so it slices the ham up, that’s literally the first thing we taught you in helicopter school