@justabloodygame: Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Give Jesus a fish, and you and your family will eat nothing but that one fish for a lifetime.
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@bourgeoisalien: [robber breaks into my house] i always knew you'd come for me, my darling. where are you going
@WillSaysStuff: I'd pray to God to help me with my overbearing KFC addiction, but seeing as the Colonel is my God, I can see that being counter-intuitive.
@NickLMao1: How about the No Bucket Challenge? Basically you just give a charity some money and don't tell anyone about it.