New rule: no video games before the time you’d normallly get home from school. That’s going to work with the 17 year old, right?
Got my son to paint our fence by telling him it was his first karate class.
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If you play Titanic backwards it’s about a guy who rises from the sea, bangs a ginger and tries to throw her over the railing of a boat.
My childhood has prepared me for a lot more bear-related pic-a-nic-basket thefts than I’m currently experiencing.
Nice empty fish tank
It’d be a shame if someone were to FILL IT WITH SNAKES!
*the terrarium is invented*
My GF is such a bad cook. The flies got together to fix the Screen Door.
if you’re havin girl problems I feel bad for you son, I got 99 problems and they’re all bottles of beer on the wall
*Deletes account because a stranger on the internet told them to
Anyone else rip their mask off when they get in to the car like they’ve just finished a disappointing surgery on Grey’s Anatomy
Which US state has the smallest soft drinks? Minisoda
There are 363 days till Christmas and people already have their Christmas lights up.