when wolves raise a human child no one cares, but when i raise a wolf as my child and send it to elementary school everyone freaks out
I accidentally had two energy drinks today and now my house is decorated for Christmas.
You Might Also Like
Nana to 3: “I love you! Who loves ya?!”
3 to Nana: “Nana!”
Nana to 3: “That’s right! Who loves Nana?”
3 to Nana: “Nobody!!!”
Never been more impressed in my life.
Facebook account for sale, friends included.
The thing about liking Kanye is that no matter how into him you are, you’re AT BEST his #2 fan.
Me: Hi, I’d like to get a tattoo on my calf.
Calf: *nervous mooing*
My sense of smell has been gone ever since the, “smell this leftover ham” incident back in 2004.
You know what a cubicle basically says? It says ‘We don’t think you’re smart enough for an office,but we don’t want you to look at anybody.’
*Pulls away from Kissing*
Me: This isn’t weird is it?
I think I pulled a muscle paying my registration fee at the gym
Me: I’m in such a happy mood right now!
Female reproductive system: Hold my beer