@YourFavMexi_Can: "I hope she got fat, I hope she got fat" - me looking up an ex girlfriend on Facebook.
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@DvuslyMarvelous: Twitter is like Gilligan's Island. We have the skills to fix the boat and leave. Instead we stay & learn how use coconuts a 1000 ways.
@timdonakowski: Been married six months and I can't even remember the last time I felt lucky on Google.