@Bluestmoon_: I love waking up next to you, I say as I roll over and gently kiss my bag of Doritos
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@EliTerry: you can tell the new mad max movie takes place in a lawless post apocalyptic hellscape because not one person used their blinker
@iwearaonesie: Hell hath no fury like a woman who doesn't remember asking you to wake her up from a nap
@TheAlexNevil: I've made friends on Twitter I never would've met in real life, and I wouldn't trade them for anything less than $200.