@WilliamAder

I prefer to think in terms of “good” cholesterol and “misunderstood” cholesterol.

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@Dexxe

These food blogs start simple.
‘How to cook rice. Boil. Serve’
But over time…
‘How to crème brûlée baba ganoush with caramel’.

@mo_HoC7

I’ve read this at least 5 times and still don’t have a clue what’s going on 😂😭😭

@shipwrecksean

I’m looking for something with the health benefits of yoga but absolutely none of the yoga

@KrazykurtKurt

I’m having one of those days where nothing seems to be going write.

@joeljeffrey

[me as a drug dealer]

Me: wanna buy some acid?

Guys: yeah, whaddya got?

Me: I’ve got fatty, amino, and folic

Guys: (stab me repeatedly)