Yeah but the way I see it is, I have the rest of my life to exercise but this 350 pack of Oreos from Costco expires in December of 2017.
I think the implication that you might want to share your Kit Kat with 3 friends seems unreasonable.
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Either I just saw a bat in the garden or the mice are using hand-gliders to avoid our cat.
“What if I took the dumbest person I know, got them severely drunk, and challenged them to finish my sentences?” — inventor of Autocorrect
I know someone who puts raisins in meatballs so don’t even try to talk to me about psychos
This quarantine is making it hard to ignore calls from people I don’t want to talk to. It’s not like I can say “Sorry mom I was at the movies.”
An egg just followed me. Now I just need some bacon.
me: what are you doing?
8: looking for my toy
me: why don’t you turn your light on?
8: i can see in the dark
me: carry on
The news is so predictable nowadays
“Hi it’s me”
“Oh hi me”
They should punish kids who do well in school with more homework to prepare them for what happens to people who are efficient at their jobs.