@KentWGraham: I used to sing my daughter to sleep at night, which is probably why her first word was “Stop.”
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@carlyken: me: *googling* am I dying web md: nope just sad me: oh good web md: and extremely melodramatic tbh me: that’s fair web md: and I think your anxiety would be more manageable if you got a job and paid rent me: *shouting from the basement* mom did you hack my computer again
@JimmerThatisAll: It's raining men because the aliens are returning the abductees in the most compelling way possible.
@Dawn_M_: Calm down shouty museum man. I think it's pretty obvious that I know how to ride a dinosaur skeleton.