@robyn_vo: I wanted to have sex with Uma Thurman until I saw her toes in Kill Bill.
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@AdamOPrice: Me: read me my Miranda rights Cop: you have a right to be the smart one. You have a right to finally realize Steve is the one for you. If you do not have a Steve, one may be provided for you Me: now read me my Samantha rights Cop [sighs]: you have a right to be the sexy one...
@caperbc75: *nervously adjusts fedora in Starbucks lineup I'll have uh, um, a mediu- I mean vanti, uh, mochacachito? Patrons: HE'S A FRAUD! GET HIM!!!
@WilliamAder: If you've ever watched a butcher wrap pork chops, you've seen me wrapping Christmas presents.