
Kiss her in the middle of her sentence
chicks dig when you visit them in jail
Kiss her in the middle of her sentence
chicks dig when you visit them in jail
People say I’m hard to get hold of but my fax machine is always on.
I think it’s obvious that Goo Goo Dolls and Lady Gaga should do a side project together and call it Goo Goo Gaga.
*stomps feet twice and claps over and over until everyone at the funeral is doing it* “we will…we will..miss you”
Our son came home one day with
a note from his first grade teacher:Your son bit another boy today.
Is he getting enough to eat at home ?
[getting a haircuit]
barber: how’s this?
me, horrified and disgusted: perfect 🙂
When walking off an elevator, I like to turn around & say, “this is the part in our adventure where I must leave you now.”
My wife and I can’t agree on appropriate gardening attire. But she’s digging in her heels.
If it comes down to Joe Biden vs Donald Trump we should just accept our fates & let a chili dog eating contest determine who’s president.
New Facebook technology can identify faces with 97.25% accuracy, and then ask you if you want to tag that statue in the background.