You say illegal, I say added to my bucket list.
If they cause you to have anxiety & panic attacks the majority of your relationship, move on.
In related news, I just broke up with my mom
You Might Also Like
If your girl takes care of animals at the zoo treat her right cause she’s a keeper.
The salon where my wife is getting her hair cut has a copy of Playboy on the magazine table. I feel like this is test.
If a guy runs his fingers through your hair, there is a 33.3% chance you are being used as a napkin.
15 just texted me that she was on her period and needed a chocolate bar.
How absorbent could a chocolate bar even be?!
My greatest fear is that I’ll be reported as a missing person and my family guesstimates my weight way higher than what I actually weigh
Bruce Willis is never content with how hard he dies.
i thought about this and shot snot
If you’re hitting the gas every time she tries to open the passenger side door, remember, the 8th time is always the funniest.
Cinderella was thrown off the basketball team because she ran away from the ball.