If you ask a haunted doll if they’re possessed they have to tell you.

You Might Also Like


Calm down, people on FB who ran the Detroit marathon. I’d be running a shit load too if I were in Detroit.


Hotel garbage cans are way too small.

How the hell am I supposed to fit my 8 take out containers, 5 empty bottles of wine, and cake tin in there?!


ariana grande looks like she was designed in a lab by japanese perverts


Mom Math:

If Child A has 2 scoops of ice cream in his bowl, and child B has 1 3/4 scoops, how many days will Mom have to hear about it?


‘….annnnnnd now you have TWO hours before you have to get up.’

~The monster under my bed


Cake is better than sex because cavities are better than babies


If the final comments of your speech last 45 minutes, please don’t preface them with “and lastly”.


For Halloween my husband asked me to dress up as a nurse, cause that’s one of his fantasies: That we have health care.