@JennyJohnsonHi5: I'm no super genius, but I bet the most effective way to lose "baby weight" is to have the baby.
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@newLettuce: [Creating snakes] God: Poison bite, no legs Angel: whoa, intense God: And and and give em knives for tongues! Angel: That seems excessive God: *sigh* Fine, forks
@ramblinma: *cuts up plastic rings so no hypothetical animal will choke on them* *will not hold the elevator for a single person, ever*
@jjhartinger: I found my husband's shirt in the dishwasher & his beer mug in the hamper, but the details of this caper have yet to emerge.
@okimstillhungry: Gets 5 hours of sleep: Wow I'm tired Gets 8 hours of sleep: Wow I'm tired and I'm late for work