spouse: what are you doing
me: i’m writing a pilot
spouse: oh that’s so cool 🙂
me: thanks *starts typing* dear han, so who really shot first?
I’m not saying my 4yo is an optimist, but while putting groceries away he held up a bag of cookies and said “I’ll just keep these in my room, ok?”
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“Because Im a goddamned rock star!” wasn’t the answer my boss was looking for as to why I was late to work, lesson learned.
I wonder who ate the first egg. Like who said, “I’m a eat the white ball that chicken just shit out.”
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*buys two $5 copies of Math For Dummies*
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