Ironically, I only know of one person with the name Common.

You Might Also Like


my son just asked me where do pizzas come from adn has yet to ask me where do babeys come from. thats my boy


Unless you fell off the treadmill and smacked your face, no one wants to hear about your workout.


7 yo son asked how Grandpa got lung cancer. I said, “Well, he quit a long time ago, but for many many years, Grandpa played Minecraft.”


94% of tea drinking is just waiting for it to cool down


There are two wolves inside me, one just took a brisk 1 hr walk while a drinking a gallon of water and the other binged an entire show and downed a pint of ice cream.


*uneasily answers phone

‘Guess who?’








‘No, I made you very happy the other night’

Haagen Daz?


Pizza Hut?


CAT scans are just like regular scans, only the techs push you off the table after.


How to make friends: Put your clothes on backwards so people don’t notice you walking up to them.