@MichaelSmartGuy: "It's five o'clock somewhere" I say as I leave work at 9am
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@broodingYAhero: Don't worry, protagonist. I'm sure your ridiculously specific amnesia has nothing to do with the missing member of the royal family who is exactly your age.
@jctsmileyone: No YOU let your kid think he could turn the traffic lights green with his mind powers until he was 10 yrs old!
@sofarrsogud: ‘Why do people even talk to babies? It’s not like they can understand anything’ I ask my dog.
@McGrumpenstein: *a colony of zombies ripping human skulls open & eating brain. Off to the side, a French zombie fries brains in butter with aioli trempette