@longwall26: It's not the most ethical move in the world, but in a pinch you can hand off a cursed object to basically any baby.
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@CulturedRuffian: Father's Day Fun: 1) Walk up to a complete stranger at lunch with his family. 2) Hug him. 3) Tell him 'Happy Father's Day dad'! 4) Run.
@AtticusFinch79: *taking training wheels off my old bike* Mom: You're not ready for this. Me: I'm 37, Mom. I've got this. *starts pedaling; hits a tree*
@KarateDonuts: Me: *pouring beer on the ground* CW: For your homies? Me: What? No. This is Coors Light. Nobody should drink this shit.