@anerdonfire2: It's perfectly acceptable to hate someone who brags about how much sleep they get
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@Midgetspar: Being a "Hopeless Romantic" sounds kinda depressing. "Pull my chair out for me?" .. "I'd love to, but I've given up."
@sublyfe2015: My mom handed me her phone to find me on Twitter... So I deleted her account, uninstalled the app, and told her it went out of business.
@Tommytoughstuff: ME: (sitting by a roaring fire) Isn’t this romantic? WIFE: Your crocs are melting.