@chrisdelia: Just overheard someone say “it’s Friday somewhere” lmao. Like... it’s just... not.
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@envydatropic: 75% of parenting is taking their keys to punish them And giving them back because they're driving you crazy
@GrantTanaka: If it looks like a duck & swims like a duck & talks like an angry duck policeman, then you about to fail a sobriety test son
@AristotlesNZ: 5yo: I dropped my damn spoon! Me: Don't be using that word! 5yo: Is it a bad word? Me: It is.. 5yo: Ok..I dropped my damn "food scooper"?