@RCKruseKontrol
@Sugar_Pac
I’m not saying don’t trust the internet, but there’s an alarming discrepancy in the number of Ipads I’ve won & the number of Ipads I own.
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@Sugar_Pac
@nikkiblackcat
every For Him gift guide is just like “have you considered sock?? what about TOOL??“
@ClaytonSykes
Headed to a funeral. #yolo
@ClassicDadMoves
Every time. 😂
@ItsAndyRyan
Her: Who’s your favourite character in the Muppet Show?
Me: The vampire
Her: He doesn’t count
Me: I can assure you that he does
@NicholasJLevi
This kid’s parent is the WORST at taking pictures lmfaooo
@dubiousrhetoric
Someone at this party is wearing the same shirt as me. It’s very awkward. How did this happen. We barely even fit in this shirt.
@XplodingUnicorn
Me: Who made this mess?
8-year-old: Not me.
6-year-old: Not me.
4-year-old: Not me.
3-year-old: A horse. I saw it.
I have a suspect.
@DrakeGatsby
Snake: Oh shit it’s a wolf we gotta run
Armadillo: Go on without me
Snake: no just-
Armadillo: @
Snake: Wait where the hell are you
Armadillo: @
@carlyken
I’m trying to teach my toddler how to headbang but he’s pissed because he wants a bottle. I told him to save that anger for the mosh pit.