Don’t tell me you’re coming to my party on facebook then go for something better last minute ugh have fun at “the wake” or whatever
ME: i love you
HER: i love you too
ME: …ok wow i put my heart on the line and you’re telling me your favorite band
You Might Also Like
Teens today have it so easy. We didn’t have self-checkout lanes when WE bought condoms.
Big shout-out to the guy in Costco buying a lifetime supply of what he thinks are the right size diapers.
I hate when people use words without knowing the meaning…gives me a huge hysterectomy on the side of my head.
Don’t bring a knife to a gun fight. Also, no outside food, they are so strict about that.
I’ve just seen a girl post a selfie with her dead grandma on facebook and thousands have commented “rip”. Stop the internet, I wanna get off
Burger King needs a new slogan. Something like “we clean our bathrooms now.”
A portmanteau is when you combine 2 words to make 1 word. A great example of this is Groupon, a mixture of grey and poupon.
[Hall of Justice]
BATMAN: What a day…I just saved Gotham
SUPERMAN: For sure…I just saved the planet
AQUAMAN: I hear ya…I just got tangled up in some brine shrimp