@brianbowman73: Sometimes you have to put your phone down and take a look at what's around you.. And wonder how you drove your car into a swimming pool.

@brendohare: If I was in charge of the Batman movies I would do a brief scene where it's implied there is a Batman in every city in America, each of varying skill. For example, the one in Grand Rapids is locked in his car

@shutupmikeginn: 'Pampers' is a good product name because it implies being able to poop in your disposable underwear is a great luxury

@SondraDeeMe: When my boyfriend gives me a hug during an argument, it looks loving, but I'm just patting him down to make sure he's not wearing a wire.

@AZHORSEMOM77: My phone says connected but somehow I don't feel it