@ericsshadow: I get all my indisputable political facts from what my uncle Harold posts on Facebook. Like did u know Obama killed the last living unicorn?

@BoogTweets: I'm no expert but a Brazilian sounds like a whole lot of bras

@Heather2Go: To support all you Movember guys, I'm not shaving my legs this month. To be honest, I probably won't shave in Mecember or Manuary either.

@hbreaker9999: My husband has a blanket pulled up over his face. I think this means he wants me to talk to him.

@funnyordie: No regrets in 2018