[movie studio in the 2010s]
“This script stars The Rock as-”
Studio: WE’LL MAKE IT
MEN TALKING TO FEMALE COWORKER BEFORE METOO:
“You look so pretty.”
MEN TALKING TO FEMALE COWORKER AFTER METOO:
“You look so pretty… bUt i GueSs i’M nOt aLLoWeD tO sAy tHaT anYmOrE hAha!”
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God will never give you more than you can handle, unless you were born in the wrong place or don’t have money. That makes God super mad.
If bank website ads have taught me anything it’s that white people love drinking coffee as they pay bills online in an empty loft apartment.
He entered the gym: eye patch on, peg leg in; he’d made his costume himself. It was a pilates class. He realised his mistake immediately.
Every time. 😂
Wow, 5 years ago we had Steve Jobs and Neil Armstrong. Now we have no jobs and no arms.
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My Voodoo doll would be a glazed ham wrapped in chicken feathers.